martedì 26 gennaio 2016


Safety is Ok, but this is paranoid (and very dangerous)

If I am so idiot to put my head out of the car window and pull up the glass Volkswagen engineer invented a sensor that will save me. It sense the pressure of my neck and send the glass down opening completely the window to avoid that my head falls on the road full of blood. Thanks Volkswagen for saving my life !
But … If I open just a little bit the window when I am running on a highway the sensor will feel the air pressure on the window and open it completely. Try to imagine what happens in a car running at 140 km/h with a completely open window: paper and dresses flying everywhere objects flying out of the window, or on my face, I nearly killed my self several times…. But of course it is my fault: it is not normal to open a bit the window while travelling.
I should specially thanks the electric plant designer: the car is so intelligent that she protects me from robbers shutting the doors if I forget them open: So, try to imagine what can happen if you are in a isolated grassland on the Pyrenees in spring, thousand miles away from home: you are laying down on the grass enjoying the sun the flowers and the white clouds and you hear “clack”: the car is locked and the keys are inside, of course you have no other keys with you and the phone is inside… yes, is true it happened to me many times.
… And what about if you hit a stone during a rain storm: you run out to check the damage and … clack ! You are locked out ! Wet, very wet… shit ! What to do now?
Battery will never dye in a Volkswagen Combi because lights will shut down after one minute to save energy. I tried many times to spend a romantic moment with my girlfriend in the car but never succeed, Klack ! Dark !
… if the car breaks down at night you have one minute to read the instruction book, than Klack ! but of course Volkswagen assistance is everywhere and you are part of a big family (at least in central Europe and not always in Umbria mountains)
I spent a lot of time reading the instructions and experimenting but after two years I still cannot understand why sometimes the car allow me to have light for 10 minutes and sometimes she decide to allow me only one minute.
Do I use the van to go robber banks at night ? Maybe this is my business... or maybe I am just a romantic guy... or maybe I just love nature at sunset: Can I turn off the external lights when the engine is running to keep me warm inside the car ? Nein ! safety ! Engine running projectors on...
I bought a Volkswagen because they are supposed to build the best vans. It arrived three months late, It drinks a lot of oil, suspension started to do noises after one year and of course the noise is not big enough to change them in warranty. In reality It is just a piece of metal not really well built, as every car builder they save money where they can save it. Quality is the same than all other trucks, but this one is full electronic, useless electronic that is only needed to justify the high price and raise the maintenance costs. All this electronic is expensive it will break down and will be expensive to repair, of course I cannot disable it. Lets not talk of repairing the car by our self as grandfather usually did … forbidden. We are part of a system: you buy a car you become a buyer of original super-expensive spare parts,
I can tolerate this, but this guys are going a bit behind the limits of what is correct. The car is dangerous.
The most incredible surprise came out just a day later I wrote this paper: I was in the car, outside was dark. As usual the car locks the doors automatically and shut off the interior lights. I don’t know where the keys are, so I try to open the doors to get some light but …
…I cannot open the door from inside, all the doors are locked !!!
…True panic … I am trapped in a dark car and cannot go out !!!
I started opening the panels to investigate what I bought and I found that all the lockers are electric and cannot be opened manually. What will happen to me if there is a crash in the electric system or if the battery has a problem ? I would like that somebody from Volkswagen explains to me what will happen if I have a fire onboard, shall I find the keys to run out ? And if the fire affects the electric system ?
Do I call the Volkswagen assistance at that point ?
Hey guys what are you doing ?
are You joking ? !

giovedì 14 gennaio 2016

Zaino, Epilogo

Kunming, French Caffè 2016 01 15

qui, dopo tanti anni
ancora una volta, aspetto di andare all'aeroporto.
Verso un paese che non è mio, dove ho mille cose inutili di cui occuparmi che non servono che mi hanno riempito la vita e continuano a rubarmi giorni e tempo
torno verso l'inverno.
ho 45 anni invecchio: male di qua e male di la
sono mali da ansia, da cose e relazioni inutili, accumulate.

Torno senza apparente motivo.
Non sono atterrato stabilmente in cina nonostante tutti questi anni. Mi ha attratto, ma da questo a fermarmi, imparare la lingua, e diventare parte di un mondo ce ne passa. L'idea di avere dei vicini mi sembra ormai uno scherzo. E se è vero, come dice lo studio di harward, che le buone relazioni rendono la vita migliore e più lunga, non vivro' molto.

Ma torno, in fondo, per un motivi più banali: una giornata di shopping di troppo e lo zaino è diventato enorme e non posso continuare a spedire pacchi a Manfredi. E poi ho fatto l'errore di comprare un biglietto di ritorno poco flessibile un mese fa in vietnam.

torno per stanchezza, ramingo impigrito, ma con l'idea di ripartire almeno con la fantasia di farlo.

Lo zaino piccolo è impazzito.
Ho provato la bellezza del vivere in tenda nei monti, nella natura, da solo, lontano dalle pulci dei villaggi e sto ricominciando a volare.
Ma un parapendio e una tenda non ci stanno
neanche un parapendio senza tenda ci sta.
Non ci sta neanche quell'amaca che serve ai tropici.

torno per troppo peso
Devo rielaborare tutto, rinunciare al computer al deodorante a tante altre cose.
Ho bisogno di uno zaino fatto apposta
torno con l'idea di farmelo.
Forse un sogno impossibile.

Il problema del viaggiare in fondo è il cibo: la cucina in quanto spazio e oggetti è l'antitesi del nomadismo.